How to Ask for “No Boxed Gifts”

One of the most popular posts on this blog is the one where I explain No Boxed Gifts and what this phrase  means.  It was something my non-South Asian guests surely were puzzled with at first, and was awkward to bring up to them.

Now, while many people might have no idea what this phrase means, you’re welcome to see this post here to get a quick explanation on what this phrase means and how to approach it.  To surmise:  it simply means that the couple prefer cash or gift cards over traditional gifts.  They have opted not to register for whatever reason.

There are some great ways to approach this and to spread the word among your guests.

On your wedding website, you can create a brief explanation such as “Having lived on our own so long, we’ve amassed everything we could possibly need for our home.  As such, we kindly request no boxed gifts.”

OR

As we are planning on moving across the country, we kindly request no boxed gifts.”

I have seen this on both wedding websites and on inserts.  Now if you’re not moving across the country or you haven’t lived on your own… there are other options!

If you do not want to create a wedding website, you can opt instead to place a variation of the following sayings in your wedding card ensemble:

-The Bride and Groom Kindly Request No Boxed Gifts

-We Kindly Request No Boxed Gifts

-While we appreciate your love and prayers above all, we kindly request no boxed gifts.


These are just some ideas you are more than welcome to borrow if you choose to ask for “No Boxed Gifts.”

Now, on the other end of the spectrum I’ve seen it done very distastefully, so I urge all brides and grooms to AVOID these:

-NO BOXED GIFTS (written in all caps as if they are truly trying to make a point!)

-No Boxed Gifts (where’s the please?)

-Cash Only, Please (are you a merchant requesting payment?)

I took a page from my super proper cousin’s book in which she included an insert with her invitation card.  Mine had information regarding our valet parking, wedding website, and at the bottom “The Bride and Groom Kindly Request No Boxed Gifts.”  While adding an insert certainly adds to the cost of a card ensemble, I personally don’t see anything wrong with putting this information at the bottom of your wedding invitation card instead.  Some people balk at the idea of placing any gift information on the card whatsoever (ask the bridal party to spread the word instead, they suggest) so if you truly want to follow wedding etiquette but don’t wish to spend money for an extra insert, perhaps place your wedding website address at the bottom of the card and be sure to include a tab explaining gifts to wedding guests.

How has asking for “No Boxed Gifts” worked for you?  Did any guests make any comments regarding this, or were they happy to oblige?  Have you seen it any worst than what I’ve written here?  Sound off in the comments, I’d love to hear what people thought!

Wedding Invitations: The First Impression of Your Wedding!

So I am currently in the midst of trying to finalize my wedding invitations to get printed! I know that I cannot wait for the box to arrive with my cards… I think that’s when it will finally be real to me.  “Mr. & Mrs. Wasim Ahmad invite you to celebrate the marriage of their daughter, Sidra Ahmad to Nikolce Trajcevski…” EEE cannot wait until I have those in my hands!  And yes, that’s his full name.  :p

Right now I’m trying to figure out the proper wording for our wedding invitations.  There are so many ways to invite people to your wedding!! There is “request the pleasure of your company” or “request the honor of your presence” or what I have written above! Decisions decisions.  There are a ton of websites to help out though and I’m grateful for that.

I love Wedding Paper Diva’s for their amazing wedding invitations…. they have regular digital wedding invitations, a thermography collection, and a letterpress collection.  Letterpress, for those of you who don’t know, is the oldest printing technique that is also incredibly expensive… it requires actually creating a metal plate with your invitation and printing onto individual pieces of paper… it’s a very unique trade which is why it’s so expensive to get.  I’ve seen 100 invitations go for $700…. definitely pricey but really lovely!

Wedding Paper Divas has really cute modern and contemporary styles and I’ve ordered a ton of samples–narrowing it down is the hard part!  I recommend ordering samples!  I ordered some wedding invitation samples from a website called RexCraft for free, but Wedding Paper Divas charges.  Of the 15 or so invitation samples I’ve ordered…. I only really LOVE 3-4 of the ones I’ve gotten.  The thing is, I liked all 15 of them online…. so it truly is important to see the invitations in person before placing that expensive order.  I spent maybe $20 total on ordering samples, but it’s absolutely worth the money.

Anyway wedding invitations are really the first impression your guests will have of your wedding.  Here are some super cute styles.  I’m not choosing this one, but I think is perfect for the modern and quirky bride:

Chrysanthemum Burst : Midori from Wedding Paper Divas

Here’s another that I think would be really cute, a play on vintage while still super romantic and elegant:

Wedding Paper Divas

And now, for the design my mom wants me to order… yes, they have an entire ethnic section that includes Pakistani and Indian style wedding invitations!!

Paisley Bliss – Wedding Paper Divas

I ordered this sample, the “Paisley Bliss” and I think it’s really beautiful in person, but I don’t think it’s one that I’ll be sending out.  They have many great ethnic invitations on this website though!  So perfect for my kind of wedding :p

Minted.com also has some cute designs but I found the invitation I want on Wedding Paper Divas so I never ended up ordering samples from there.  Here is a cute winter wedding invitation style from Minted that I love!

Winter Flourish - Minted.com

I LOVE the design of this one, the “Winter Flourish”, it’s so unique and fun…not your typical wedding invitation at all..

Here’s my dilemma now…. I am including a response card and am worried that people will fill in extra guests on their cards, which, is so inappropriate.  I was going to write this on the response card:

_____ seats have been reserved in your honor
_____ accepts with pleasure
_____ regretfully declines

Now I think that’s a good way of telling people that only a certain number of seats have been saved for them…. but I’m still worried people are going to write things in! So I wanted to write this little disclaimer at the bottom:

Due to space limitations, we kindly request that extra guests not be added.

Ok, even as I write that above line, I cringe.  Because I know it sounds awful and tacky… so I’m left with this dilemma, do I pray that the “_ seats have been reserved in your honor” do the trick and give people the hint?